Can you forgive?
by Stitched.Angel
Summary: Ana's life changed when she looked at that phone, when she read them emails from that one day. Now she is going to follow her gut instead of her heart. There is no way that she can forgive Christian, not only that but she has another person to think about now. But things begin to look strange and if she wants to make it work she has to connect the dots before everything is wrecked.
1. Chapter 1

I was looking through Christians messages and emails as well as call lists, I was invading his privacy, something which I had never thought I would be doing, but something felt off. Something inside me was telling me to look, that there was something I needed to see.

Glancing up Christian was sprawled over the bed fast asleep, the sound of him softly snoring, the image made my heart warm but something else in my heart froze over. Concentrating back on the phone I went through his emails. Most were from work, a few from Mac, the man who works for Christian I had first met on 'The Grace', Elliot, his Dad, his mum grace, his sister Mia, his assistant Andrea, then I spotted one with the tittle 'Last night'. It was sent the first night after Christian went away on a business trip. My eyes flickered to Christian then to the phone again, I clicked on it.

_**Christian,**_

_**It was great seeing you again, after all this time. I cant wait to meet again. **_

_**You know how to rock someone's world that's for sure.**_

My breath caught and I stared at the screen in disbelief, I felt my stomach flip but took in a few deep breaths to stop myself from being sick. but I read on. Needing to read on.

_**Thank you for an amazing night. We will have to do it again, sometime soon.**_

_**You have to make a decision about what you want and what you are going to do about the problems at home. I will always want you Christian, but I hope I don't have to wait too long as **__**I won't wait forever Christian. You need to make a choice and soon.**_

_**Thank you again for last night.**_

_**Always your L xxx**_

This time my stomach did flip and I jumped out the chair and ran to the bathroom, locking it behind me in the process, making it just in time I threw up into the toilet, my body shaking with every heave and tears streamed down my face. _He was cheating on me, the evidence is right here, still in my hand._ Finally I finished being sick and used the back of my hand to wipe my mouth, very lady like I know. Before I could talk myself out of it I forwarded all of the emails from 'L' to my phone. It was somewhere in the apartment on silent and password protected.

As I took deep breaths my sadness started to be replaced with anger, breaking through my tears and nausea, it hit me like a brick wall. This time my body began to shake and I stood up using the wall for support. Something inside me snapped and I grabbed the nearest thing to me I threw it, it hit the mirror and both of them smashed.

It felt good to throw things and let my anger out and something was telling me to continue, my subconscious was there ready for anything bouncing from side to side on the balls of her feet with a pair of boxing gloves on looking at me with approval, she mouthed screw the consequences and I grabbed something else, letting my rage take over me fully.

Grabbing my hair dryer, I threw it to the glass shower door. I heard it smash but I didn't check to see as I broke other things. I kept going until every part of my anger was gone and my legs turned to jelly underneath me and I sank to the floor. Bringing my knees up to my chest, I wrapped my arms around them. _how could he! How could he do this to me? To us? To our marriage. It was plain and simple right here in black and white. _Putting my head on my knees I began to rock back and forth as silent tears of pain and heart ache ran down my face.

That was when I heard a lot of movement outside, the door handle began to rattle furiously and I heard Christian's voice shout through it. "Open this fucking door now! Anastasia!" his voice was loud and you could hear the anger and also concern in his voice. Other people's voices came through the door then.

"What's going on Christian?" Taylor's voice, there was another reply but I didn't make it out, by Christian banging on the door, "where is she? Is she hurt?" this time Taylors voice was full of so much worry and concern that it made a new wave of tears break through. "Christian. Move!"

Normally Taylor talked to Christian with so much respect but with only those two words there was none in that, obviously he was worried about me and had only one object, which was to get to me. Christian must have done what he said because the next second I knew, the door was being kicked. I looked up on the second kick wide eyed, that's when it flew open.

I heard a sharp intake of breath and then someone cursing under their breath, Taylor was the closest to the door, so it was him who had kicked it in, Sawyer was there his back towards me holding Christian back, he was now turned half way and looking at me, anger flared across his face. Christian had his eyes glued on where only a few seconds the door had been, Mrs Jones had her hand over her mouth and tears in her eyes.

Christian tried to throw Sawyer to the side but Sawyer pushed him back, I have never seen anger on Sawyer's face. Taylor came walking in slowly, one hand behind him obviously telling the rest to stay out. My eyes locked with his still wide and frozen, like a rabbit in the headlights, he reached me then knelt down infront of me.

There was noise in the background, Christian shouting as well as Sawyer, but I focused on Taylor, he slowly held his hands out to me, the look on his face told me that he wasn't going to hurt me and that I could trust him. "It's okay Darling I'm not going to hurt you." So even slower than he had held his hands out I placed mine in his, I heard him let out a sigh of relief giving me a small smile and then he slowly helped me up.

My legs were still like jelly and I stumbled, concern plain as day shot across his face and he quickly came to my aid, bending down he picked me up. I wrapped my arms around his neck tightly, holding to him like a life raft and buried my head into his shoulder as I began to cry. "Let's get you out of here." Slowly he began to walk while whispering that it was going to be okay, that he wouldn't let anything happen to me. Then he kissed the top of my head in reassurance and whispered that he promised.

As he made his way out of the bathroom I looked at it over his shoulder. Both of the mirrors were smashed into thousands of pieces; bits of broken fragments lay on the counter and the floor. The glass shower door was broke; there was a dent in the wall. Broken bottles of shampoo, hand wash, and conditioner lay around. The glass cups and holders were on the floor, the towel rack was pulled off the wall and lay on the opposite side, as well as the towels and robes scattered around the room, it was as though a bomb had gone off, and I had made it all.

"I'm going to put you on the bed okay?" Taylor's voice was soft next to my ear but as he tried to put me down I tightened my grip and didn't let go, so he kept me in his arms.

"Not here. Keep him away" it was barely audible but I knew he heard because he began to walk again this time out of the bedroom.

"Where are you taking her?" it was Christian who talked but Taylor ignored him and kept walking, picking up his pace. "Taylor answers me." We were in the main room. I saw someone quickly move past us and open the door to Taylor's office.

"Get her something to drink will you please love." At Taylor's words Mrs Jones hurried off to the kitchen. Once inside he put me slowly down into a chair, this time I let him and I quickly wrapped my arms around my knees. Then Taylor left, as soon as the door closed I heard shouting both Christian and Taylor.

I caught sight of Sawyer at my side as he pulled out a blanket from one of the cupboards. Walking over to me he unfolded it and wrapped it around me, then stood close to me, eyes flickering from me to the door then back.

Something about him being there made me feel safe, I looked up and met his eyes and he gave me a small smile then sat down on the chair arm next to me. I moved over a bit and he let out a small laugh and sat next to me in the chair. He put one of his arms around me and rubbed my arm.

It was comforting and I leaned into him resting my head on his shoulder, as well as pulling the blanket over him. I closed my eyes and tried to block out Taylor and Christian shouting.

"Thank you." I whispered it to him, my body felt exhausted.

"I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." Something about the way Sawyer said those words made me feel safe, yet at the same time the way he said the words held so much promise.

I knew he had just made a deal with himself. Something which he was going to stick to no matter the consequences.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N

Thank you so much for the reviews and follows, I am nursing a hangover so I am sorry if it is jumbled in parts but I really wanted to get this posted today for you all.

Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter.

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I must have drifted asleep because when I woke I was still in Taylor's office, still in Sawyer's arms my head on his chest. I looked up at him to see him asleep. The serious expression he always held was not there, he was calm and looked younger. It made me smile seeing him sleep, no doubt he didn't get much as it was with his job.

I needed to drink but if I made any sudden movements I knew that he would wake, so I slowly began to slip out of his hold. Standing all of my muscles was stiff from the way I had fell asleep so I stretched. From the light coming in through the floor to ceiling window it was just after sunrise.

I reached the door but noticed that it was locked. Was it to keep me in or Christian out? Looking around the office I saw a pair of keys on Taylor's desk, retrieving them I tried them both in the door and one of them fitted the lock and I opened it and began to walk down hallway into the kitchen.

There was nobody around however Christian's door to his study was open ajar, reaching the fridge I opened it and pulled out a carton of orange juice. Pouring out a glass, I put the carton back in the fridge and took a welcome sip, it tasted amazing.

That was when I sensed someone behind me, I knew before I turned who it would be, after a few seconds I took in a deep breath and turned to a waiting Christian. He was wearing the clothes he had fallen asleep in his jaw was tense and his eyes bored into me. Neither of us said anything we just looked stared at each other. I finished off the orange juice in the glass and turned to wash up the glass.

That was when I felt his arms wrap around my waist making me jump. Something about his touch was like a bucket of ice cold water being thrown onto me, instantly my spine straightened and every muscle in my body tensed. I tried to move out of his hold but he didn't let me go. Instead he leaned forward and placed a kiss on the side of my neck.

"Let. Me. Go." I said each word slowly through gritted teeth a second later I heard Christian take in a sharp breath as though my words had physically winded him. I slipped out of his arms and stood a few feet away from him.

"I can explain. It's not what you think" that made me let out a small laugh of disbelief, wow he was really trying to pulling that off. "Ana I am being serious."

"Really Christian that's the best you can come up with? I saw the emails it doesn't take a genius to figure it out. Just tell me why? What did I do wrong that made you feel the need to go and fuck another woman?" I wrapped my arms around my belly protectively.

"No Ana" he took a step towards her and she instantly took a step back. "Please just listen to me. I never meant-"

But she cut him off before he could finish "you never meant to what Christian? Never meant for me to find out? Never meant to cheat? Never meant to fuck some woman and lie to your wife?"

"Ana"

"Don't you dear 'Ana' me! How could you do this to me? To us! How could you go off and do god knows what with that woman and then come back here and…" I couldn't finish the sentence, just thinking it made me feel like I was going to be sick. "We were happy! We are married! I am fucking pregnant with your child after you fucked this woman! God how could you!" she threw her hand up and had tears escaping from her eyes. She was shouting so loud that it was surprised Sawyer or Taylor hadn't come out.

As if on cue Sawyer's body came to stand next to her, Christian looked at him, his eyes blazing with unspoken fury. "Leave now" But Sawyer didn't seem bothered. He stayed stood at the side of me, shifting slightly so that half of his body in front of mine, in a protective gesture. "I said leave."

"No. I don't take your orders no more." Sawyer's voice was low and sounded as though it held a challenging tone to it. I knew that Sawyer was there to make sure I was okay and to protect me but Christian would never intentionally hurt me. I reached out and touched Sawyers arm, his eyes fell down to mine at my touch. Christian's eyes widened and he stared at my hand in disbelief.

"I am okay, I can handle this. Can you please go pack me a bag?" I gave him a small reassuring smile. With one last cold stare to Christian Sawyer turned and walked off in the direction of the bedroom.

"Your leaving." the way he said those words was as though he had been wounded. "You can't leave me. Not again. I won't let you." his voice was a desperate plea. He took a step towards me but I held up my hands indicting for him to stop and he did his hand falling through the air to his side.

"You should have thought of that before you cheated. I am not staying here. I can't stay here! I cannot stand to even look at you right now Christian."

"Ana I didn't-" he squeezed his eyes shut, I saw movement to my right then Sawyer placing a duffel bag down near the entrance to the foyer. She turned to Sawyer. She cleared her throat which hurt from unshed tears.

"Everything ready?"

"I just need to get some things" she gave him a small nod and watched him slip off to Taylors office, then she turned back to Christian. Who was staring at her his face pained, it made her heart twist and she wanted to hug him, he looked like the lost boy his eyes haunted.

"Please don't leave me, it was stupid. I shouldn't have done it. I need you Ana. Only you. I love you. Your my wife. Please forgive me and then we can go back to how things were. We are happy. I will make it up to you." he pleaded his voice breaking.

"I'm sorry Christian. But you made this decision as soon as you decided to sleep with that woman. You can't expect me to forgive you for this." With that she turned and left, pausing at the table in the foyer she took off her ring and bracelet placed them down. Sawyer had returned and he picked up two duffle bags and pressed the button for the elevator. She was aware of Christian close by. When the elevator doors opened they walked in, she turned to him.

"Sawyer I can't possible allow you to come with me, I will be okay."

"I am not leaving you. I promised." With that he pulled one arm around her waist and pulled her to his chest. she leaned into him burying her head in his chest and screwed her eyes shut to stop another load of tears.

The doors of the elevator opened and they stepped out, Taylor was stood there next to Sawyer's car, Taylor pulled Ana into him and kissed her forehead. He whispered to her. "Take care of yourself Darling and the baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't know anything for sure until-"

"Its okay Taylor. I don't blame you this is his fault nobody else's" she placed her hand on his cheek then removed it and kissed his cheek. Stepping out of his hold Taylor opened the door for her.

Sawyer stood by the same side of the car, Taylor pulled Sawyer into a hug and then they slapped each other on the back. "Take care of them both and keep in touch. I sure want to know how you all are doing."

That was when a door slammed into the concrete wall and we turned to see Christian rush over. He managed to grab Ana's arm and pulled her to him.

"Get your hands off her!" Sawyer's voice was like venom as he stared at Christian, he looked as though he was on the verge of throwing Christian off him and beating him up.

"Shut up! She is not yours! She is my wife and you will not leave me!" This time Christian began to pull her towards away from them, causing her to stumble. "You are mine and you will not leave me." Ana's eyes widened and the blood drained from her face making her feel light headed, she had never seen Christian like this and it scared her. She tried to pull her arm out of Christians grip but it only made him tighten his hold causing her to wince.

"Sawyer!" Taylors voice rang out but it was too late Sawyer dived towards Christian.

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Good? Bad? Complete and utter disaster? I know a cliff hanger is always a pain but got to keep you guessing and thirsty for more right? Review and tell me what you think…..

I am going to be studying for my exams every day this week and next week for hours but I will try upload a chapter as soon as I can.


	3. Chapter 3

Sawyer's fist connected with the side of Christian's jaw so hard that we both stumbled back into the wall. I put my arm out to stop myself but instead it filled with pain. Christian let go of my arm and began to match Sawyers punch, my opposite arm came up my arm. The sound of the impact of their fists echoed through the garage, it was a sickening sound of bone against flesh, both men were throwing punches just as hard as the one they had received. Christian delivered a hard punch into Sawyers cheek and a punch to Sawyer's chest, which Sawyer countered with an upper cut and punch to Christian's ribs causing Christian to stumble back, both slightly winded.

Sawyers turned to me and grab my hand to lead me to the car "come on," before we could reach the car Christian attacked him from behind, they both fell to the floor but quickly regained position standing, they were both facing each other ready to fight.

Sawyer took in a deep breath his jaw tensed. "Get her out of her Taylor" Sawyer shouted over but it sounded more like a growl as they both punched each other, he punched Christian's face, the impact causing Christians head to turn and blood to flow from his nose.

"She goes nowhere!" Christian shouted back wiping blood off with his hand and then delivered a punch back, his fist connected with Sawyer's lip and he spat some blood out of his mouth.

Taylor was by her side in a second, he touched my shoulder and arm, seeing if it was damaged. "Nothing is broken. Come on get in the car." He took her arm and steered her to the car.  
"We need to stop them Taylor." she turned and saw that Sawyers lip was bust and Christian had blood coming from his eyebrow. Both men looked as though they were about to kill each other, Sawyer came back with a full swing to his face then a quick elbow to Christian's ribs. But Christian quickly recovered and delivered quick sharp punches to Sawyers face. They both were lethal.

Taylor was also watching them as well and I could tell that he wanted to stop them both but didn't want to leave me here. "Please Taylor make them stop." I sobbed.

"Stay here." with that he turned and approached them both. I felt useless stood there doing nothing, so I made the decision I jogged over to them as Taylor was about to reach them, he saw me and gave me a look that said that he should have known better, I slipped in between them both and they both stopped throwing punches. Both of them looked at me then back at each other, both of their eyes narrowed as though they were challenging each other to dare try to touch me. Christian's arm came out and wrapped around my waist but I moved out of his hold. Anger filled Christian's face again and he was about to take a step forward to grab me when Taylor grabbed Christian by the arm pulling him back, it gave me chance to stand in front of Sawyer and make him take a few steps back. I placed my hand on Sawyers arm and turned to Christian who was still in Taylor's hold.

"Stop. It." I looked at both of them when I said it. I felt sawyer let out a calming breath, he was the first to speak, "okay."

I gave him a small smile I looked at Christian who was staring at me, "Christian?"

"fine." But he looked at Sawyer with a murderous glare causing me to sigh and roll my eyes. Well at least one of them was being cooperative. Taylor let go of him after a few seconds and nodded at me. Then moved to Sawyer,

"Give them a few minutes." Taylor said to Sawyer, Sawyer hesitated at first and then I nodded at him with a small reassuring smile, they both walked towards the car, stopping at the back.

I put my hand on my hips and stared at Christian. "I want answers."

"Come upstairs not here."

"No, here." I was going to stand my ground and also it meant an easy exit.

"fine." I could sense that he was irritated with me but I couldn't care.

I took a deep breath before starting to make sure that my emotions didn't get the better of me. "How long?"

"It happened a few weeks ago, maybe a month at the most." He looked at the ground, his voice full of ashame.

"A month?" I gasped out.

"Ana I'm sorry-" I cut him off by raising my hand.

"I don't want to hear your apologise. Why?"

"It just happened. I was drinking and well."

"it just happened? It just happened." I tested the words a few times then let out a small laugh and shook my head and rolled my eyes. "so it just happened? How many times did it 'just happen' then?"

"Ana." His voice was pleading.

"who was it Christian?"

"she's an old business partner. Please Ana, come back upstairs, don't leave. We can get through this, we will figure something out. I love you."

"That doesn't change the fact that you cheated Christian, not only that but you came back and didn't even tell me, you lied to me. I don't think I will be able to forgive you. All of my insecurities, you played with them all and didn't even tell me!" I was on the verge of tears as I squeezed the last words out past the lump in my throat. "I knew when I married you what I was getting myself into but I didn't expect you to do this, you always said that you hated cheating. But to betray me like this, do you realise how much you have hurt me by doing this?"

"No Ana please, please don't say that. We will find a way. I can't lose you, I can't, it will break me. You are everything to me. I am sorry. I was stupid, I shouldn't have done it. I am so sorry. Please. I love you." his voice was full of panic.

"Christian please don't make this worse than what it has to be. I need time to think about all this, I need space. this isn't going to be fixed straight away and you throwing away everything which we worked hard to over come isn't going to be mended straight away."

"I will give you space, just please don't leave me. Stay here, I will stay out of your way. I will I promise. Just please don't leave. I need you here with me."

"No Christian, I am not going back in there, not with you. Please do not follow me, just give me some space that's all I am asking, I need to think this all through. I will phone you when I have."

"Please Ana, we are going to have a baby, we can figure this out if not for ourselves then for the baby." He was using that as a way to make me give in and it only fuelled my anger even more.

"I don't believe you! How the hell can you try to use my baby against me? If you think for one minute that I am going to let you make me forgive you for my baby's sake you have another thing coming!" I realised that my voice was getting louder but I didn't care, how could he say that? "You are unbelievable! It has been less than 24 hours since you stormed out and got drunk then went and spilled your guts to Elena about our life! After everything which she has done to us, you go running straight to her! You blamed me for this pregnancy, claiming that I did this on purpose. You were cold and hurtful to me! I am not going to forgive you fully even if we do work something out for my baby's sake."

"Your baby?" he looked as though I had slapped him in the face.

"yes my baby! I want you to be there for him or her but the way you are acted earlier makes me think that you don't even want this baby. I wont keep them from you but I can't be with you and I sure as hell am not letting you us them as a way of dragging me back into this mess. Which you created."

"Oh wait I get it, you want to go off with him." he nodded towards Sawyer who was still talking to Taylor by the car but his eyes were locked on us. "You are saying that I am cheating and lying but I see the way you two look at each other and act, you touching his arm earlier, him automatically coming to you."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing Christian was accusing me of cheating with Sawyer. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me. There is obviously something else going on between you two. Your leaving me to go off and start a life with him. I will not allow it Ana, that is my child not his! or is it?"

My anger reached it's breaking point and I slapped him. "How dare you! Is that what you think? Well you are fucking wrong Christian!"

Christian rubbed his jaw and looked at me wide eyed, as though he was finally seeing me. "You just slapped me."

"Yes and I will not apologize for it but I will apologize for the bathroom." I turned away from him and walked off to the car. I saw that both Taylor and Sawyer were staring at me. I stopped in front of them and took in a deep breath, that's when I realised that Sawyer had a smirk on his face.

Taylor was the first one who spoke. "The gps tracker on the car has been removed. He will not be able to track you."

"Thank you Taylor, you didn't have to do this. You're both risking your jobs doing this for me, I cant ever possibly thank you enough."

"Don't be silly Ana. Just as long as your safe." he pulled me into one final hug. "You do what you have to do sweetheart, I know you will do right you always do. Luke is going to be with you every step of the way. Just please keep in touch." he kissed my forehead then walked and opened the car door for me. I climbed in and Sawyer climbed in behind the wheel and started the engine and began to back out. I waved at Taylor and saw that Christian was stood looking at the ground, he looked up and pain filled his face again a second later he was banging on the window.

"Luke." hearing the panic in my voice he pressed a button locking the doors and windows fully.  
"Don't leave, I deserved it. Please Ana, I am sorry. Please phone me when you have had some time to think, we can fix this. I can't lose you not again!"

I looked at Sawyer then back to Christian, who Taylor was now holding back again as Christian begged for me to stop and come back.

"Wow girl I didn't know you had it in you." I knew he was referring to the slap.

"I slapped him. he tried to say that I had cheated and that this baby wasn't his. He will end up following us." I began to pick at my nail, then looked up to Sawyer. We had stopped and waited for the barrier to lift. He was watching me his eyes filled with anger which he was trying to keep in control.

"you had to do what you had to do Ana," he gave me a small smile, it was the first time he had called me Ana, yet after last night and today it seemed comforting knowing that we held more than a professional relationship, we had built a friendship. Then he pulled out of Escala and began to drive. "I have a place in mind that we could go to, it's a few hours out of Seattle but it is remote, so he won't be able to find it easily, its my sister in laws. But we will need to swap cars just to be sure we are not followed."

"Okay, thank you for doing this for me Luke. I am sorry about the fight."

He let out a small laugh. "It's okay, he deserved it and he deserved that slap as well, remind me not to piss you off. "

He looked at me and we both smiled.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N

Thank you for the reviews.

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Luke drove a few miles before stopping, we switched cars, made a phone call, then we were back on the road. Two hours later we pulled into the driveway of a beautiful cottage with a high wooden fence around the whole perimeter. The front yard had a stone pathway with bushes on either side leading up to the home. The garden was well looked after, the grass was neatly trimmed, flowers were in various objects: a wooden wheelbarrow, hanging baskets, plant pots. Lanterns sat on the ground of various sizes all held candles, there were solar panelled lights to on the ground to light the pathway at night.  
"Wow it's beautiful." My voice was full of amazement.  
"I know. It's amazing what Vicki has done to the place in such a short amount of time."

We got out of the car and walked up to the cottage. Near the door was a wooden bench and small pond which looked to hold fish. Before Luke had chance to knocked on the door it was opened by a woman, she was a little older than me, tall with blonde hair and green eyes.

"What happened to your face Luke?" the worry was clear in her voice, she inspected his face, his lip had stopped bleeding but held a small cut, then his jaw and cheek which had begun to bruise on the way over. "You have been fighting." she grabbed his hand and looked at his knuckles which were red and slightly bruised.

"It's nothing, things just got a little rough when we left." His eyes quickly flickered over to me, I felt guilty for Luke being involved, it was my fault that Luke had gotten into a fight in the first place. "Victoria this is Ana. Ana, this is my sister in law Victoria." Luke made the introductions and we both exchanged hellos.

"I made up the two spare rooms after you called. First how about a tour and then we will get you settled in?" she clapped her hands together smiling at me. She was obviously proud of her home and wanted me to feel welcome and comfortable.

I looked up at Luke who shrugged. "Okay."

Victoria took my arm and walked me into the house. She paused and turned to see Luke stood next to me. "What you doing still stood there?" Victoria put her hands on her hips and stared at Luke one of her eyebrows raised but I could tell that she was trying her best to keep a straight face.

"I will go get the bags from the car. I will be right back." With that he gave me a nod then went out the door.

"Marcus should be home soon, he phoned and said he was on his way!" she shouted before the door fully closed. "Men," she began to lead me through the house.

The interior was just as breath taking, the ceilings were high and everything was so open, the floors were wooden and the walls a soft cream. To the left were 3 steps down to the living room which held an open fireplace, two sofas, a coffee table, a television and two bookcases filled with books, and a glass cabinet with different kinds of ornaments.

"Do you read?" Victoria asked when she saw me looking at the bookcase.

"Yes, I love reading, when I get the chance."

"Same. You can read any of them but please I beg you do not mark the page." She put her hands together as though she was praying.

"I won't. Thank you for letting me stay, well us stay, I hope it's no trouble for you."

"Don't be ridiculous, it's no trouble." I smiled at her and she smiled back at me. She led me through the house pointing out various rooms, down the hall were a study and the kitchen, upstairs there were four bedrooms and three bathrooms. It was a nice cosy place everything was bright and cheerful as well as welcoming.

While Victoria gave me a tour of the place she told me about how her husband, Luke's brother Marcus, and her had met, they were complete opposites in college, she spent most of her time in the library at college, Marcus was on the football team with the bad boy look, they met when she was rushing to get stack of books to one of the teachers, one of Marcus' football friend's thought it would be good to knock her books out of her hands and they all scattered on the floor, in a huge mess along with her study notes. Marcus' helped her pick them all up and it went from there. We ended up in the kitchen preparing food for tonight when she change the subject around to me, I could tell that she was curious as to why I had left but she didn't ask directly.

"Luke has told me some about what has happened, but he won't go into detail. He just said that you both needed a place to stay for a while which is off the radar. He has told me not to question you about it and I don't intend to, it's not my business nor is it anybody else's. This is something you need to work out and figure out what you're going to do next but don't walk into something blindly, think things through and note all the possibilities and what is better off for you. But I will say one thing, Luke is my family, he takes what he does seriously and when he commits to something he commits to it one hundred percent, so don't take him for granted or do something which will jeopardise what he has worked hard for. Apart from that you can stay here as long as you need to."

"That is not something which I would do, I know what Luke is sacrificing by doing this for me and that he is risking his whole job, just so that I could get away. It is not something I want to happen, he is a good man and I will forever owe him for it."

"Okay, I just wanted to make sure you knew. Sorry for doubting you, i just had to make sure you understood that it isn't just you who will suffer the consequences. But just know though that no matter what happens you need to always think about what is best for you, it is your life and you deserve to live it how you want to."

The front door opened to the sound of two male laughs, a minute later Luke walked in with Marcus, I recognised him from Victoria's description and also he was wearing his fire station uniform. Marcus walked over to Victoria and kissed her cheek then gave her a hug, Luke came over and sat next to me on one of the stools. "You both okay?" his voice was dropped slightly, so I knew that he was referring to me and the baby, I nodded and he smiled at me. Something about being near Luke felt good, I felt calm and protected. I knew that he wouldn't let anything happen to either of us.

"So you're Ana?" Marcus' voice made me look away from Luke's gaze. "I'm Marcus, Luke's older yet more amazing brother if you can't tell already." Victoria slapped his chest playfully and he turned to look at her. "What did I say?"

"Ignore him Ana. He just thinks that he can try to embarrass Luke but he forgets Luke could probably kill him." She leaned up and kissed his cheek before turning back to the chicken she was preparing, she rolled her eyes causing me to smile. "I didn't get chance to show Ana the conversion Luke, why don't you take her to look."

"Ana?" Luke stood and offered me his arm, I took it and he led me to a door at the back of the kitchen. He paused before opening the door, "this is my favourite part of the whole place." he flipped a switch by the door then opened it and led me through. It opened into an attached to the house, which looked to have once been a small barn, now it had been converted into a dining room, the floor was brick, the ceiling high with wooden beams, the room was bathed in a soft light from the fairy lights which hung from the beam to beam attaching to a chandelier. Flowers were in pots in the corner of the room, in the middle of the room was a dining table holding eight chairs.

"It's beautiful."

"It was a surprise for Victoria. It drove her crazy not knowing what Marcus and I was up to in here, she thought that we would change it into a games room. Which technically we did up there" he pointed to a set of stairs which lead to an upper floor.

"You did this?" I looked at him wide eyed.  
"Yes." He gave me a smile.

"This is amazing Luke. Thank you for showing me."

We made our way back into the main part of the house.

The rest of the night went well, we all sat and watched a film and talked. Victoria and I kept talking about books, which one was our favourite, we discussed scenes of plays, I was surprised to see that we had a lot in common. I tried my best to stopped myself from thinking about what had happened today and last night, of Christian and of what I was going to do now. It wasn't until I was alone laid in bed that I let myself think about it all, that I let the walls I had up all day finally slip. I ended up crying for hours, they were silent but the feeling of my heart being broken again and again as the hours passed was not any less than the first time. Finally I drifted off from exhaustion, but even in my sleep I couldn't escape the nightmare and mess my life had become.

A part of me blamed myself, maybe if I was what he had needed then he wouldn't have cheated. However a part of my brain screamed at me that it wasn't my fault, I knew what I was getting myself into when I agreed to marry Christian but cheating was not one of them. Christian was the one who was to blame for his own decisions and choices, it was not me. Which meant he was going to have to suffer the consequences.


	5. Chapter 5

For the next few days Luke and I stayed at his brother and sister in laws, we talked, watched films, read books, went for walks in the nearest town, everything felt calm and peaceful, you could even say normal. Every morning when I was sick Luke or Victoria would be right there by my side, at night when I cried myself to sleep or during the day when I broke down into unexpected tears, Luke would be there, he'd hold me until I finally fell asleep or cried it all out. It was comforting to know that he was there for me, someone that I could cry to and talk to.

Over the past few days I had thought everything through, all of the possibilities, the problems which Christian and I had faced together, the things which we had overcome and how I felt about him. There was no doubt that I still loved Christian, I always would, he had shown me a life I could never have dreamed I would have. Christian was everything I wanted, everything I needed, he made me happy.

But there was also the fact that if we did find a way to sort this situation out, even though this was the first time that he had cheated, I would never be able to fully trust him again, we would never be the same, I would always doubt him, wonder if he was going to cheat again, wonder if I was right for him, or if I was what he needed or even wanted. I didn't want to feel like I was trapping him into a relationship or marriage which he didn't want to be a part of.

I also had to consider the baby. Christian would see the baby that was for definite, I would allow him to be there and to be a father to my child, to our child, I wasn't going to be selfish and make not only him but the baby suffer because of something which went on between the two of us, something which was down to the both of us, there was no point in making it a tug of war match between us. But I had decided that no matter what happens the baby will stay with me, i might not be able to provide for it or give my baby everything it wants but I would try my best and love him or her unconditionally. But the baby was not going to be a way to bring us back together, it would be neutral ground so to speak.

I had made my decision and if I was going to stick by my decision he had to know, and the only way for him to know was by telling him. If I was going to sort things out with Christian I was going to do it properly, face to face. I had made the decision and slept on it to make sure that I had a clear head and so that I could think things through again, so it was time for me to stop moping around and to say what I needed to say. I walked downstairs, Luke was sat on the sofa reading, I smiled at the sight, it was one of my favourite books and I had tried to not give him a spoiler, even when he had asked. So I went and sat next to him, he looked up from the book.  
"Luke, could I use your phone please?" I needed to get a new one still, after leaving mine at Christian's when I left.

"sure, everything okay?" he handed me his phone.

"Yes, I just need to check in with Taylor and see if Christian can meet tonight or tomorrow." I began to fumble around with it in my hand.

"Okay." I stood up and found Taylors number in the contact list, I began to pace before I pressed the call button. Luke had told me that he would be there with me no matter what my decision was. Taking a deep breath I pressed call. Taylor answered on the second ring.

"Sawyer is everything okay? Are you both okay? Is Ana hurt?"

"Taylor, it's me. Ana." I sounded a little nervous.

I heard him let out a sigh of relief. "Ana, how are you? You're okay right and Luke's okay?" for some reason his worrying made me smile and I looked at Luke who's eyes were following my movements as I paced.

"Yes Taylor, we are both okay."

"good. That's good. How you been?"

"okay, I guess considering. Actually I phoned about Christian."

"Oh, okay. Do you want me to go get him? he is in a meeting but he told me to tell him when you call."

"No, Taylor wait, I don't want to…I mean…I have." I rubbed the back of my neck and took in another deep breath. "What time will he be home tonight? Well does Christian have any plans for tonight?"

"Well he has three meetings and will have to make a few phone calls but I don't know if he has made any new plans as of yet for any dinner reservations. I will check to see and phone you back in five minutes if you want?"

"Thank you Taylor."

"No problem sweetie."

He hung up and I let out a sigh then turned to Luke who stood as I handed him his phone. "Taylor is going to phone back in about five minutes."

"Want some breakfast?" I nodded and we walked into the kitchen. I put on the kettle as Luke went hunting in the fridge.

"What time are Victoria and Marcus going to be home at?" Marcus was a firefighter and Victoria worked at a horse riding school.

"Victoria should be home around 4" Luke's phone vibrated and he pulled it out and slid it across the counter top to me. "Marc should be back anytime now."

I picked up the phone and answered it "Hi Taylor."

"Ana is that you? Why didn't you just phone me? You didn't need to phone Taylor. Is everything okay? Are you okay? God, I feel as though I have been going crazy waiting for you to call."

"Hello Christian." I began making a cup of tea and a coffee as I spoke. "It was easier that way, plus you were in a meeting so I didn't want to interrupt. Are you going to be busy tonight? We need to talk."

"I can reschedule it, shall I pick you up or meet you or you come to me?"

"No Christian, if you have plans then it can wait until later or tomorrow."

"Don't be absurd you are my wife. This is more important, our future and you are more important to me than a business meeting."

After a minute I let out a sigh. "Okay, I will come to you. Actually can we will meet somewhere?"

"I can clear my schedule for this afternoon and reschedule the two meetings I have so that you could come to Escala."

"No Christian, don't do that. What time will you be finished? Your meetings I mean."

There was a couple minutes of pause before he spoke. "Fine, I will have to make a business meeting at 5 across town to finalise some documents but I should be finished around 6."

"Okay, could we meet at a restaurant around 8?"

"I will make some reservations for two." Crap, this was not something which I expected, there was no way that Luke would let me go on my own, and I knew that if I told Christian he would pop a blood vessel with anger.

I cleared my throat and looked at Luke, who was busy buttering toast, I smiled slightly, okay so here goes. "Actually Christian, Luke will be there as well." My voice was wary.

"What!" I pulled the phone away from my ear as he began shouting, exactly the reaction I knew would happen. I briefly picked up some of what he was saying, well shouting. He mentioned something about not wanting him there, dinner with his wife without people interfering.

A few minutes later I put the phone back to my ear. "Please I don't want to argue about this, just make it reservations for four, you, me, Luke and Taylor. Okay?" I could tell that he didn't agree with what I had said and I expected him to start shouting. Luke put down two plates of scrambled eggs and toast onto the counter. "Christian, please."

"Fine, I will get you back Anastasia, I promise I will make this right between us. I will sort this. I love you." my eyes began to water and I put my hand over my mouth to stop myself from letting out a sobbing sound. That was when I felt Luke move next to me and put his arms around me and I rested my head into his shoulder, he quietly whispered deep breath, so taking in a deep calming breath I began to get my emotions back in check.

"You too, Christian. I have to go, can you please get Taylor to text the address and time to Luke?" My voice broke halfway through and I knew that Christian had probably registered that I was trying not to cry.

"Yes." I heard him take in a deep breath before continuing. "Ana?"

"Yes Christian?"

"Please don't cry, I am sorry for everything. Please, forgive me."

"Christian. We will talk tonight. I will see you tonight." I hung up before he could say anything else then burst into tears. Luke held me for a few minutes then pulled back and looked down at me.

"It's going to be okay. I promise. It's going to take a while but it will be better soon." He wiped away a tear which was falling down my cheek. "Quit with the tears and let's eat. Plus Vicki will be dragging you to go shopping tomorrow since it is her day off and isn't shopping meant to be a big thing for you females? Talking about girl stuff and spending hours on end in shops."

"Okay and yeah pretty much." We both sat down and began to eat. Luke was a great cook, something else I had learned over the couple of days, he already knew a lot about me but he still liked to hear and find out more. "Thank you."

"No problem. You know I remember the last time I was forced into going shopping with Vicki, and by forced I mean forced. She blackmailed me into it. She shopped for hours and then she went into shops and would come out with more bags then she would hand them to me and Marcus and run to another shop while we minded the bags. It was actually torture but it's not like we could complain so we sat there quietly."

I laughed imagining it. It was so like Victoria and I could just imagine what she would have done if they had complained. It made me feel a little excited about tomorrow, it had been a while since I had been out with a female in a while and I had a feeling that it was going to be fun.

When we had finished we washed and dried then went into the living room again. Luke sat down and opened up his book again, he was halfway through it. I opened up his laptop and opened up Google. There was something which I needed to look for.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N**

**Sorry for not posting a chapter I have been studying for my exams and going through some personal problems but I managed to find some time to write this. Thank you so much for the reviews and for just taking time to read this and being so patient, I really appreciate it.**

**A few of you have asked about the a/n where I said it was a yes/no cheating story, I can't find it but if I did I am sorry I would have meant it as a question for your opinion as in has Christian cheated yes or no? I should have made that clearer, that is my fault again sorry. Yes it is a cheating story.**

**Greydaysohmy – Sometimes Misskkkiss checks some of the chapters for me and makes a few changes. But it is hard for us being in our senior year with exams to focus on and me having moved.**

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POV ANA

"Done!" Luke shouted throwing his arms out, he made me jump and spill my water on my jeans, luckily just missing the laptop.

"Luke!" I screeched. I looked at him and he had a massive grin on his face.

"I tell you I didn't expect it to end like that. It almost had me in tears." He dramatically pretended to wipe away a tear from his eye causing me to laugh. "Hey wait have you just peed yourself?" he said teasingly.

"NO!" I said a bit to loud.

"I am kidding, calm down you hormonal woman. So what you been up to over there all quiet? He scooted over as I turned the screen to him. I had been looking on the real estate website for an apartment or house.

"There are a few nice apartments near Lakeview Park and it looks really nice area. There is one in particular that I like. It has a really good spacious floor plan and good money wise." I clicked on the website, which I had save into the favourites and showed Luke the laptop. He looked at the pictures and nodded.  
"It's great," looked down at my hands. "What is it Ana?"

"I…I... Are you going to be living there as well? It's not that I wouldn't like you to, it would be great if you did but it's just that well you don't have to, you have your own life and well you don't need to keep being around me, I can handle this on my own, you work for Christian not me. It's not fair that you have put your job on the line for me when I know how hard you worked to get where you are. I don't want to cause any more trouble for you and I know that if you do and Christian finds out he will be angry and-" he put his hand over my mouth to silence me. He removed his hand and began to speak.

"I would love to live with you and the baby Ana but only if you want me to. I don't want to get in your way and I know that you will be a great mother to your baby and I don't want to complicate things but if you would like me to live with you then I will. What we have is a strong friendship and I don't want to loose that. I want to be there for you and the baby and I will be no matter what Christian says. As long as you want me there then I will be there right by your side." I smiled at him my eyes filling up with tears. He let out a laugh and pulled me into a hug. "Jesus Ana seriously again? Pregnancy and your emotions are not good." I laughed and hugged him back then.  
"I would love for you to live with me and the baby but be warned pregnancy equals mood swings, tears and not to mention when the baby comes."

"Well now that I think about it." he teased. I playfully swatted his arm. "Kidding, I am sure that I can handle it. if not I will just shut you up with a big tub of ice-cream or whatever crazy stuff you will be craving."

That made me laugh, then Luke's phone vibrated and he answered it.  
"Sawyer….Taylor….yes she is here….okay…." he looked over to me. "Do you want me and Taylor in the restaurant with you?" I nodded. "Same table or separate?" I thought for a minute.

"Separate but near each other." I said giving him a small smile.

"Did you get that?" he said back to Taylor. "Taylor says hi."

"Hi Taylor." I said loud enough for him to hear.

Luke laughed at something "Good, I will sort that out, just text me their number….i know them so I will get it done quickly…they won't."

I went back to the computer but went on YouTube instead and began looking up crazy videos, I use to do it with Kate when we were in university to pass the time. God I missed her, would have to talk to her soon and meet her, tell her what has happened. God I didn't even know what had happened, well not fully all I knew was that Christian had cheated. With who was the question and I was scared to know the answer. Mostly why so soon after we had got married? But I needed to tell Kate and everyone that I was having Christian's baby, it wasn't like I could keep it a secret.

I clicked on a video of epic fails and I was soon laughing. I was laughing so hard that my sides began to hurt.

"Yes she is okay." Luke leaned over and looked at the screen then laughed. "She is watching this crazy video on YouTube….okay...we will see you there." he hung up and I burst out laughing again, I was laughing so hard my eyes were watering now.

"Luke, watch this." I put it back to the beginning of that clip and played it. Soon we both were laughing so hard that I thought we wouldn't be able to stop.

A few hours later

Luke pulled into a parking space and we both got out of the car. The restaurant was nice, it was Italian and as soon as we walked through the door I felt hungry, the smell was amazing. The place was not that quite busy considering it was almost 8 o'clock and I was grateful that I had decided to wear my red blouse and borrow one of Vicki's black pencil skirt with a pair of her heels. The inside was beautiful, high roof's with with wooden floors and deep red wallpaper which reminded me of the play room, the tables were evenly spaced out with red table cloths. There was music playing softly in the background. The vibe was homely and very calming. A middle aged woman smiled at us holding some menus.

"Hello welcome to Berengar." **(I don't know if this is an actual restaurant or not but I typed in Italian names and it sounded cool so I picked it)** "Do you have a reservation or are you looking for a table for two?" The woman's voice held a strong Italian accent. She might own this place or maybe her husband did.

"We have reservations under Grey." I said and she smiled kindly at me.

"yes tables 12 and 14. Mr Grey is already seated if you would follow me." She began to lead us to our tables. the place was amazing. "The chef cooking today is Watson. He is very talented and began working here almost a year ago. We are lucky to have him." She stated proudly. The name made me stop walking, Luke instantly stopped as well and looked down at me.

"Ana are you okay?" Luke asked holding my arm, it took me a few seconds to reply.  
"yes." I nodded to him then looked at the woman who was looking at me concerned. "Sorry to ask but could you please tell me Chef Watson's first name?" I asked, her eyebrows pulled together for a second. I hadn't heard that surname for ages but the chances of it being the Watson's was not possible, well it was but I hadn't heard from the Watsons in years.  
"Jake. Jake Watson. He moved down here from up North somewhere near-"

"Montesano." I said finished her sentence. She nodded. this was a coincidence, I hadn't seen him in years since he and his dad had moved just before we had finished College. If I was him it would be great but what if it wasn't him, it seemed more likely after all I hadn't come across anymore Jake Watson's while I was living there with Ray. I didn't see Christian or Taylor approach until Christian was stood right in front of me and spoke.  
"Ana what's wrong? Are you okay?" I looked up at him then back to the woman who was looking at me confused.

"Ermm…I'm not sure." That got me a few worried looks. Luke's body stiffened at my words and he and Taylor did a swipe around the restaurant as though trying to spot an attack. "I mean yes. I…I just…" I turned to look at the woman again. "Could I have a word with him?"

"With who?" Christian said. "Ana? Tell me what you are on about." I put my hand up silencing him and I shushed him. I could see Luke out the corner of my eye trying not to smile, he coughed to cover it up a laugh and I nudged him.  
"I don't mean to be a bother or bother him but I just need to talk to him. It won't take long I promise." I said to the woman who was looking more confused.

"I could have a word with him and see if he can. Can I take your name?" she said almost warily.

"Steele." I said which earned me an eyebrow raise from Christian.

"Grey." Christian said as though correcting me. God sake he was annoying me and we hadn't even spoken and it wasn't like Jake would recognise me or if I said that it was Grey. He would just think it was Christian Grey who wanted to speak to him not me.

"Can you tell him Steele please?" I said smiling at her ignoring Christian's glare at me.

"Yes of course." she said smiling at me.

"Thank you." I returned her smile. "Christian. Taylor." I said smiling.

"Shall we take our seats?" Christian said sounding impatient. I wonder what was up with him, maybe it was the name thing or because i didn't answer him, I sighed.

I looked up at Luke who was watching me. "I know him. well I think I do, I hope. I will have to see if it is the right person."

"Okay. You going to be okay?" He looked over to Christian.

"Yeah. Nice cover up by the way." I teased.

"Couldn't help it." he said with an innocent shrug causing us both to laugh.

We all took our seats. Christian and I were sat at a table on our own by the window while Taylor and Luke were sat on the table across and one down. Luke was sat so he was facing me.

"Are you going to tell me what that was all about? Last time I checked you are still my _wife_." Christian said his voice low as he sat down. i knew that was what he was being moody about. Great how was I going to tell him.

"We have more important things to discuss other than someone I may or may not know and yes I am your wife for the time being." I said resisting the urge to roll my eyes at him. My gaze flickered over to Luke who was watching me while talking to Taylor. He nodded and I smiled back.

"So you have thought things through?"

"Yes. I thought everything through." his eyes lit up with a spark of hope.

"Great where shall we start?"

"First I want you to know that no matter what happens tonight or between us I want you to be part of my baby's life, our baby's life. I am not going to keep him or her away from you but if you do not want to be in the baby's life then I will understand. If you do then the baby will be neutral ground. I will not punish you with this baby by refusing to let you see him or her, our problems are our own and I do not want our baby to have to witness them."

"I understand completely and I do want to be in our child's life, I want to be there for you and for the baby." I nodded. "I know that what I did is unforgivable and I should never have done it, if I could take it back I would. I should have told you but I didn't instead I lied but I tell you the truth now and answer whatever you want to know. I just hope that you will forgive me and come back home. I hate you not being there."

Someone cleared their throat behind me. "Well look who flew into my Restaurant if not my own little Butterfly."A male voice said from behind me. Christian stiffened at the comment and he gave the owner of the voice a murderous stare. My face split into a huge grin at my old nickname, I looked up noticing that Luke was watching ready to come over, his eyes flickered to me and he visibly relaxed no doubt due to the massive grin on my face. I turned in my seat and my eyes widened to the size of basket balls.

A man stood in front of me, well he was more like a giant he was around 6 foot 5 maybe taller with the same jet black hair and light brown eyes, he was wearing a chef's uniform. I let out a squeal and jumped to my feet and ran into his arms, throwing my arms around his neck, he returned my hug with his bone crushing ones he always gave me, I was buried in his arms, my feet left the floor and I tightened my arms around his neck, laughing. It was definitely Jake. It was actually him! After all this time.

"I hoped it was you." I said with my head buried into his shoulder."I have missed you so much." I said through a sob. i hadn't realised that I had began to cry. God he smelled the same as when we were children.

"I have missed you too Butterfly. There's no need to cry." he said his nose in my hair. He let out a sigh then took in a deep breath.

"I'm sorry." I said.

"No need to apologise. How's Ray doing?" he still hadn't put me down.

"he is good, how's Andy?"

"He is good too, he will be over the moon when I tell him I have seen you. Let me get a look at you." he put me back on my feet and held me at arm's length, getting a good look at me. His hand went to my cheek and he wiped a tear away and stared into my eyes. "You have changed Annie."

"So have you Jakey, you're a giant now." I said shockingly causing him to laugh and flash me a mischievous grin which one of his dimples. He had changed so much, but that grin still was there, it always would be. I had seen it thousand times before and loved it still. "Well some things don't change you still have got the grin."

"Yeah it has the woman lining up, well for my food as well." He said, causing me to laugh.

"What do you expect you always did attract them."

"Well don't worry you will always be my _Girl_." he said flicking my nose with his finger.

"She is spoken for so now. You will have to find another G_irl_." Christian's voice said from next to us, his voice was like the artic and he said the word girl sarcastically. _Oh my god! Seriously? _I turned to see him stood there with his gaze locked on Jake as though sizing him up. I let out a sigh and rolled my eyes at Jake. He gave me a _is he for real? _look whichI returned it with a _it's a long story _look. Which rewarded me a _you will have to tell me_. I nodded and he smiled causing me to smile.

"Finished?" Christian said again raising an eyebrow at me with a _I know what you are doing_ look. Oh my god this is ridiculous! I narrowed my eyes at him.

"I'm sorry man. I didn't mean to interrupt or imply anything." He said slightly wary of Christians tone looking between us both.

"No no, you didn't. Jake this is my….husband Christian. Christian this is Jake, we grew up together and haven't seen each other in a_ long time."_ I emphasised the words long but worst of all I had hesitated and both Christian and Jake had picked up on it. Okay this was going to hit the fan any minute.

"Nice to meet you Christian." They both shook hands but glared at each other. This is totally ridiculous. "I have to get back anyway the food isn't going to cook itself. But I will cook you our favourite just get Serena to tell me it's your order. okay?" I nodded and he pulled me into another hug then kissed my cheek then hand "I will catch up with you later Annie." I watched as he retreated to the back.

I turned to see Christian still stood there staring at me. "What was that?" I said my tone clearly showed that I wasn't impressed.  
"What you hesitating? I don't know _Annie_ why was that?" he said as though he was talking to a child who was in the wrong and he used the name which Jake had called me since we were teens. Which made me angry for some reason.

"Oh grow up Christian!" I took my seat and looked over to Luke who had his eyes glued on Christian. Christian looked at Luke and gave him a look that screamed _back off_ and then he sat down opposite me again. We both stared at each other for a couple of minutes neither one of us saying anything. What the hell was he doing, we were okay then he changed all of a sudden with Jake.  
"I'm sorry." He said at last. I let out a huffing sound. "I am, I am sorry Ana."  
"What for being an arse in front of my family?" i said folding my arms on the table.

"You said he was a friend."

"Well he is like a brother, he is my family and the way you just acted with him...it was disrespectful and down right rude and it's not the first time that you have done it either, you was like it with Jose, with Ethan."

"What do you expect when he was trying to force you to-" I cut him off before he could finish.

"Oh my god! that was one time! One time and you are holding it against him like he had committed a crime. We were drunk and nothing happened." I hissed at him my voice low. "Why do you always try to act as through I am your property? That i am yours? i am not. Not anymore." I said and I didn't realise how true those words felt until now.

"You still are." he said daringly.

"No I am not." I said dead pan looking up at him. "I. Am. Not." I said more slowly looking him straight in the eyes.

"I am still yours and you are still mine. You belong with me."

"There you go again trying to make me your property. I am a human being not some object which can be carted around." This caused a smile to play on his lips. "Oh my God there was nothing sexual about that." I hissed.  
"Your a little bit aggressive tonight aren't you?" he said eyeing me as though I was about to breathe fire.

"Well what do you expect? you are acting like a child!" I hissed.

Why was he getting on my nerves so much, this was going to be a long night and it had only just begun.

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**A/N**

**Okay so what do you think? Sorry if it isn't what you was expecting but I promise I will make sure there will be answers in chapter 7. What do you think of Jake? Do you like him? Also what do you think about how Christian is behaving? Do you think he is intimidated by Jake? Again sorry for the confusion in the previous chapters and if you have any ideas or questions please PM me or put it in the review.**

**Thank you for reading. I promise the next chapter will be better.**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N**

**I was listening to Seether "worlds fall away" and Artic monkeys, "Do I wanna know" while writing this chapter so that might give you an idea of what I was thinking. Anyway enjoy and yes there are answers and I am sorry that it has took this long for you to get answers.**

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"Okay, where were we?" I ask, if we was going to get through this night without arguing we had to at least try to be civil about it.

"The baby," he said with a small smile.

"Yes, like I said I am not going to keep this baby away from you I want you to be part of our lives and no matter what goes on between us I do not think it is right to put the baby in the middle of it all and cause it to suffer because of our mistakes."

"I agree. Please consider coming back home it will make things easier for us. You belong there. With me. I have been having sleepless nights, worrying, thinking. " he looked at me pleadingly and I was going to crumble and say yes but instead I took in a breath. I knew that I needed to tell him.

"I... I don't think that would be the best thing at the moment." _Keep it together. You can do this. Breathe._ "You have to understand Christian that it won't be that easy for me to trust you again, over time I might but I will always have a small bit doubt. We both need space. Well I need space and time to process the answers which I will hopefully get."

"I will answer whatever you ask me." Okay so here goes. I took in a deep breath and pushed my emotions to the back of my mind and addressed this as though it was a business meeting, when I looked at Christian I could tell that he saw the change in my eyes and expression.  
"You said that it was roughly 2 months ago?"

"yes." He nodded.

"Why so soon after we were married?"

"I don't know. I met with her while I was on a business trip and well I had been drinking after an argument we had." My subconscious raises an eyebrow.

"Did you…did you have sex?" This answer will determine how much we needed to work on and if we could sort this out. Christian watches me warily before he answers.

"No." I let out a breath which I wasn't aware I was holding. "No, I didn't have sex with her."

"Then what did you-" hold on did I want to know this? I knew the answer was yes I needed to. Christian changed in front of me he ran his hand though his hair obviously worried and a little wary.

"Do you really want specifics?"

"Answer the question Christian." I said not aware of my voice being so cold he registered this as well because he frowned slightly. Just then the waitress came over but the woman who had greeted us, I presumed was Serena came over.  
"It's okay love I've got this table." She turned to us. "Are you ready to order?" l looked at Christian who was frowning at me. She looked at Christian then back to me. "I can come back in a few minutes if you would like?"

"No, no it's okay. I will have a glass of sparkling apple please. Chef Watson told us to tell you to tell him that it was our order, so I don't know what food." I said giving her a polite smile and shrug. "Christian?"  
"I will have whatever the chef is cooking for Ana's order and a glass of Sancerre please."

"Certainly, your drinks will be with you in a few minutes." with that she walked off no doubt aware of the tension between us right now.

"So?" he still hadn't answered the question and with each second he looked like he was getting frustrated and he refused to speak for a few minutes. "Are you ignoring me?" still silence. What the hell! "Christian. Your being childish again, either answer or I will leave right now."

"Jesus crist Ana, what do you expect me to do? I have apologized and told you again and again that it was a mistake that I didn't mean for it to happen. But you want answers, answers which I know will make you walk straight out that door and not look back." The waitress came then with our drinks and I gave her the warmest smile I could. He wanted me to reassure him, reassure him that I would not leave or walk out on him. Could I? Could I promise that I wouldn't walk out of this restaurant as soon as he told me the truth? I rubbed my temple in frustration. If I wanted answers, and I sure as Hell did, then I would have to. I let out a sigh.

"I will not walk out of this restaurant when you tell me the truth. Now answer the question or I will leave." There, my voice was cold and I narrowed my eyes at him a fraction. I took a drink of the sparkling apple juice to distract me.

"It was the hard stuff. Okay. Happy?" he ran his hand through his hair twice and I choked on my drink.  
"What?" I couldn't believe what I had heard, this was not happening it was my worst nightmare come true.  
"Don't make me repeat it Ana. Please." his eyes and voice were pleading as he reached for my hand I moved it away.  
"But you said…" I was speechless. It was everything I feared since I left the first time. Christian cheated on me because I was inadequate to meet his demands, because I couldn't give him what he needed. I felt my eyes begin to fill up with tears. "Who was she?!" I snap trying my hardest to keep my tears at bay.

"Ana." He runs his hand through his hair again and drops his head into his hands.

"Tell. Me." Jesus my voice is like acid. He doesn't look up to me as he whispers her name, I barely catch it but it stops my heart in a beat. No! Oh God Please no. please say he just didn't say her name. After everything we have been through.

"I need to go to the restroom." I quickly stand knowing that if I didn't get out of here now I would either burst out crying or scream at him.

"Ana wait you said that you wouldn't-" but I blocked him out. I practically ran into the restroom and when I got into a stall I lock the door and I slid down to the ground not bothered that I was wearing a skirt I bring my knees up to my chest, a small sob escapes, my hand fly's up to cover my mouth and the tears began to stream silently down my cheeks. He said he didn't need it anymore. That it was part of his past, how could I have been so stupid to believe that, of course he would always need to be dominant, he needed the control and power he felt when he had a submissive on her knees in front of him and the hard stuff. Fuck! The belts, the crops, my stomach flipped as an image of the photographs, the ones I had found while looking for the jeans he wears in the playroom, came to mind only this time I imagined her there. I throw up into the toilet.

Why…why did it have to be Leila?

A few minutes later there was a knock on the door. "Get away Christian!"

"Ana, please. Just let me explain, I don't remember much of that night but please give me a chance."

"I did give you a chance. Now get out of here." my voice is just full of emotion, I can't take this, I can't see him, I need to get out of here. I need to go home, well back to Vicki's and Marcus'. I heard the door open.

"You get the Hell out of here." he said his voice sounding deadly to the person who walked in.  
"I don't think so." Luke's voice was just as deadly.

"Luke?" I say relieved.

"its okay, Ana we're getting out of here."  
"I don't think so. This doesn't concern you. You are security nothing more. Now if you do not get out of here I will fire you." crap no Luke can't be fired. I slowly got to my feet.

"Got ahead, all I care about is protecting that Woman in there who doesn't deserve what you have put her through."

"Get. Out!" Christian shouted. I unlocked the door quietly, Christians back was to me, his fists balled up at his side, but Luke was facing my direction, both men were glaring at each other as though they were ready for another episode of what happened in the garage, a smirk slid across Luke's face at something Christian was muttering, neither one of them had seen me approach. Slowly I made my way to them both.

"You lay one single finger on her and I will personally see to it that you suffer and never see the light of day again." I froze in my tracks and the blood drained from my face. Christian had just threatened to kill Luke and it frightened me to the bone. Luke spotted me over Christian shoulder and his eyes widened at little and filled with concern. I saw Christian slowly stiffen then turn and his face ashened.

"Luke. Take me home." I said my voice shaky. He reached around and extended a hand which I took. Lukes grip on my hand tightened as he pulled me to his side, guided me through the door. All the time I was aware that Christian was following us.

When we got outside Christian stood in front of us stopping us, well stopping me from passing. "I am so sorry. Please Ana come home I will explain it all, everything. Please don't hate me I couldn't handle it if you did." His face was my lost boy, scared and his eyes full of fear. It broke my heart again. I reached up and touched the side of his face and caressed his cheek with my thumb. He leaned into the touch and closed his eyes briefly. Leaning in I kissed his cheek.

"I'm sorry, I don't hate you I never could, you have just fucked up big time." I let my hand drop. "I will phone you when me and Luke find a place." He recoiled with my words and anger exploded through his body.

"What?!" he shouted. Crap I hadn't told him. I thought I had. I mentally slapped myself again.

"I will call you when Luke and I have found a place to live."

"You're not living with him! I will not allow it!"

"You don't have a say in it Christian. I will do what I want and live with whoever I want. You do not own me! So sort your jealousy out because Luke is staying in my life wither you like it or not! He is my friend and he has stook by me while you go off and fuck one of your ex's! If you so much as touch him I will make sure you regret it! And if you think for a second that I will forgive you straight away you are delusional, its going to take a lot more to make me come back. So buck up your ideas because I am not going to be made a foul of!" I shout back at him. He tried to grab my arm but I pulled it out of his hold and Luke shifted forward slightly placing me half behind him as he glared at Christian.

"I will not allow my child to grow up in a place with another man, to grow up calling someone else dad!" I was beginning to get a headache and all I wanted was to sink into a nice hot bath and just relax and try forget about today.

"We explained this earlier. Now I am going home to sleep, don't follow us Christian. I will contact you when I am ready." With that I barged passed him and stopped in front of Taylor, who gave me a sympathetic smile. "Hi, I'm sorry to cause more bother."

"Don't apologize Ana, I know you will do what you need to. You're a survivor. I stand by what I said before." I hugged him then pulled back and climbed in the car with Luke, who kept watching Christian in the rear-view mirror.

"Take the long way to make sure he doesn't follow us please. " I say leaning my head again the window, kicking off my heels I bring my knees up. God I got answers but the truth hurt more than I expected.

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**A/N**

**So there you go, some answers. I know Ana is running again and she hasn't resolved much with Christian but she has some answers and she knows the truth. What do you think of her standing up to Christian? Also there will be another person involved in the next chapter so tell me who you think it might be.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N**

**Okay this is a short chapter for you but it will clear some things up it is also the second chapter today. I will upload another one hopefully by Tuesday or Wednesday and I will do a CPOV in a couple of chapters.**

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The next morning I found myself in Vicki's stables, she owned a gypsy vanner and he was beautiful. I had no clue what had made me think of coming here since I despised horses since my very disturbing childhood memory, I normally wouldn't go within 10 feet of one and if I did I made sure that there was a fence or something between us. Yet here I am stood right next to one feeding it a carrot and brushing its mane. I don't know why but it made me feel calmer, I placed my head against its shoulder as it ate hay and it felt as though every thought within my mind had just vanished.

"Things are so messed up." I say out loud and the horse snorts in reply. Seriously I am talking to a horse. I laugh at the thought but carry on anyway. "I love him, I always will and I know that Christian wouldn't have done it on purpose, there had to be a reason and something stopped him from having sex with her, I guess that is the main thing which you could say is the silver lining in all of this, well it is a plus side in all of this. But I still don't understand why Leila? After everything we had been though, after she was in my apartment with a gun, he cheats on me with her." the horse let out a neighing sound and tilted its head to me. I rubbed my hand along its forehead. "It's just so confusing. He says he doesn't remember most of the night that he went for a drink and she was there. But why was she there of all places? She was meant to be at the art school and in a rehabilitation centre. Something just doesn't add up."

I stayed quite for a few minutes then continued, who would have thought that a horse would be a good therapist for me? "Then there is the whole problem with baby." I laid my hand on my stomach and smiled. "I told Christian that I wasn't going to keep him or her from him. I want him to be around our baby and for our baby to grow up with both of their parents, getting along and not always fighting but it feels as though we are playing a board game and have been told to go back to the beginning."

My phone began to buzz and I pulled it out of my bag which was on the side. The horse made a snorting noise and then became slightly uneasy next to me, I placed my hand on its neck again. Looking at the user ID I saw it was an unknown number. So I answered it warily.  
"Hello?"

"Well hello Anastasia, it's been a long time and I think we need a little chat. Don't hang up." It was Elena, what the hell was she doing and how did she get my phone number. something about the way she is talking is as though she has just found out that she has won a ton of money.

"What do you want Elena?" I say bluntly

"Well I did warn you remember that if you so much as hurt him again that I would find you?" oh yes the little treat at the mascaraed ball.

"Well as I said then and I will say now your threats mean nothing, you cannot hurt me or christian."

"Are you sure about that Anastasia? I can find ways around everything." She said daringly. What was she getting at?

"Well I am sorry to give you a newsflash but Christian and my marriage has got nothing at all to do with you."

"It has everything to do with Me." she said but I ignored her and carried on.

"I thought that we both made that clear when we announced that we were engaged if I remember correctly you ran out of the Grey's house. You mean nothing to Christian and he finalised that by having you pulled out of his companies and business ties. So instead of sticking your nose in our relationship I advise you sort your own out first." _There take that! _i smile at my boldness and I can't tell that Elena is taken back slightly as it takes her a minute to reply.

"Oh dear you are young, of course you would think that. But you see I see things, things which you don't and let's say those things would make or break that precious little marriage you are so fond of."

What! What was she trying to hint? "You don't see anything Elena because there is nothing to see."

"Oh Ana, are you sure? Because I see more than you think, I also know that you are going to drag him down with you, there is no way that you can be what Christian needs and when he sees you for what you really are and he will eventually you will be thrown aside and well he will come back to me. He always does dear."

"Listen Elena I don't have time for your little games. Stay away from me and Christian or I will make sure you regret it."

I hung up at the sound of her laughing, god did she sound like a witch when she laughed. Maybe a house could drop on her. Ergh that woman is so frustrating and what the hell did she mean she sees more than I think? And that it is because of her that we are married. I swear if she does anything to stop me and Christian from somehow managing to sort this mess out I will probably kill her.

Should I tell Christian about Elena? It would worry him and cause him to get angry at her and then he would end up phoning her and she will try to rub that in my face. God! But if I don't tell him and he finds out by someone else then it will be bad. Then also if she is planning something on this marriage then she needs to be stopped. I won't let anyone get hurt anymore. So yes I need to tell Christian. Should I phone him? I don't know he might busy. I will email him that way he can email me back if he isn't busy.

I open up an email and began to type then press send.

_**From: Anastasia Grey**_

_**Subject: Early morning Harrass call**_

_**Time: 6:30am**_

_**To: Christian Grey**_

_I have just received a phone call from Elena Lincoln. Could you please tell me how she has managed to get a hold of my number and the last time you spoke to her? And why she is making threats on OUR marriage._

_Ana_

I click send and pace the length of the barn waiting for a reply. A few minutes later there is a reply.

**From: Christian Grey**

**Subject: Phone call**

**Time: 6:34am**

**To: Anastasia Grey**

I don't know how Elena has received your number and I definitely don't know why she is asking you about our marriage, it was made perfectly clear to her that she is no longer part of my life, our life. What did she say? What was the number which she phoned you off? What are you doing awake this early?

Christian Grey

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

_**From: Anastasia Grey**_

_**Subject: Phone call**_

_**Time: 6:36am**_

_**To: Christian Grey**_

_It was a blocked number so I don't have it. Couldn't Welch find it out if we give him my phone? Or no doubt she will phone again. she pretty much said that she has everything to do with our marriage and it is practically in the palm of her hand. She knows something Christian but how?_

_I can't sleep so I am busying myself and thinking with the help of a horse before i received the phone call._

_Anastasia_

There is a reply within a minute.

**From: Christian Grey**

**Subject: Curious**

**Time: 6:37am**

**To: Anastasia Grey**

Aren't you scared of them? Last time we saw a horse you practically ran screaming.

Welch will check it out, I don't want you talking to that woman. She is poison. As for why she is phoning you I have no idea. I will get to the bottom of this, she knows nothing and if she does I will stump it out before she even knows what's happened. Nobody threatens my family.

Christian

CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc.

_**From: Anastasia Grey**_

_**Subject: Busy CEO?**_

_**Time: 6:39am**_

_**To: Christian Grey**_

_This one is special he talks back and stops the nausea._

_I am fully aware of what she is like Christian, I am just surprised you didn't see it before I came into your life. she is out for blood Christian and she has her finger pointed at us. _

_I do not have anything planned today, I could drive down to either Escala or your work whenever you are free later. I do not want to interrupt your work schedule._

_Ana_

_**From: Christian Grey**_

_**Subject: A fly on the wall.**_

_**Time: 6:42am**_

_**To: Anastasia Grey**_

_So now my wife has become a horse whisperer, you are very talented Mrs Grey, just be careful please. I don't want you to get hurt. _

_Of course I will be, you come before my work. I will be in the office most of the day and I will get welch to check it out as soon as possible._

_How are you and the baby today?_

_Christian_

_CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc._

_**From: Anastasia Grey**_

_**Subject: stop worrying.**_

_**Time: 6:45am**_

_**To: Christian Grey**_

_The horse will not harm me, he was very calm until the phone call then after I hung up he settled back down. You know what they say about the 6__th__ sense they have._

_We are okay, no morning sickness yet which is good and a relief. How are you?_

_I should be there around 11 If that is okay?_

_Ana_

_**From: Christian Grey**_

_**Subject: counting down the hours**_

_**Time: 6:46am**_

_**To: Anastasia Grey**_

_That is good then, sorry that I can't be there with you. I am okay just tiered been up with work._

_You don't need to have a precise time Ana, you can come round whenever you please it is your company too. Would you like to go to lunch?_

_Christian Grey_

_CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc._

_**From: Anastasia Grey**_

_**Subject: Raincheck**_

_**Time: 6:48am**_

_**To: Christian Grey**_

_No Christian it is YOUR Company not mine. Try to sleep then when you get the chance to. Christian we both know that we need to sort this out and hopefully we do soon. But I need a little time. We can talk later about some of it. _

_Me running to the bathroom to put my head in a toilet first thing in the morning isn't a good sight, trust me._

_I have an appointment with Dr. Greene, I was going to tell you last night and ask you to come with me but well things kind of hit the fan again pretty fast. So would you please be able to come with me today it is at 12 o'clock?_

_Ana_

_**From: Christian Grey**_

_**Subject: Wouldn't miss it.**_

_**Time: 6:50am**_

_**To: Anastasia Grey**_

_Is everything okay with you and the baby? There is nothing wrong is there? I would love to, if you are sure. I know what you mean I wish things were different but I will never be able to forgive myself or ever apologise enough._

_Just to see you I would do anything._

_Christian Grey_

_CEO, Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc._

**_From: Anastasia Grey_**

**_Subject: _**

**_Time: 6:48am_**

**_To: Christian Grey_**

_No Christian nothing is wrong it is a routine check-up, just to see how the baby is doing and to get a rough due date. Of course I would want you there. You still are my husband and the baby's father and you deserve to be there. I wouldn't keep you from something like this._

_I am partly to blame as well I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I am sorry. I will see you later._

_Ana_

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**A/N_  
_**

**I said it would be short, the next chapter will hopefully be up in the next couple of days. What do you think Elena is doing? Review and tell me what you think I will try to answer them as best I can.**

**Thank you for reading.**


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